Thinking About Prayer....

Some twenty years ago I was introduced to

Frederich Buechner. His words were salve to my aching heart as I began to reframe my faith and ask genuine questions about what I had been taught as a Christian believer. For the first time in my life I was making friends with the reality of MYSTERY in my relationship with GOD. I was just beginning to realize that I was being called to LIVE INTO THIS GREAT MYSTERY. With joy I began to discard the "simplistic answers" and the "empty language" I had grown so accustomed to. I was for the first time embracing the Greatness of my CREATOR, the Beauty of this MYSTERY.

I want to share this wonderful excerpt Frederich Buechner wrote on prayer. This helped me to see prayer in a whole new light.

 

PRAYER by Frederick Buechner  (From a book: Wishful Thinking, A Seeker’s ABC’s)

We all pray whether we think of it as praying or not. The odd silence we fall into when something very beautiful is happening or something very good or very bad. The ah-h-h-h! that sometimes floats up out of us as out of a Fourth of July crowd when the skyrocket bursts over the water. The stammer of pain at somebody else’s pain. The stammer of joy at somebody else’s joy. Whatever words or sounds we use for sighing with over our own lives. These are all prayers in their way. These are all spoken not just to ourselves but to something even more familiar then ourselves and even more strange than the world.

According to Jesus, by far the most important thing about praying is to keep at it. The image he uses to explain this are all rather comic, as though he thought it was rather comic to have to explain it at all. He says God is like a friend you go borrow bread from at midnight. The friend tells you in effect to drop dead, but you go on knocking anyway until finally he gives you what you want so he can go back to bed again. (Luke11:5-8). Or God is like a crooked judge who refuses to hear the case of a certain poor widow, presumably because he knows there’s nothing much in it for him. But she keeps on hounding him until finally he hears her case just to get her out of his hair (Luke 18:1-8).Even a stinker, Jesus says won’t give hi s own child a black eye when the child asks for a peanut butter and jelly so how all the more will God when his children…(Matthew 7:9-11)?

Be importunate, Jesus says—not, one assumes, because you have to beat a path  to God’s door before he’ll open it, but because until you beat the path maybe there’s no way to getting to YOUR door. “Ravish my heart,” John Donne wrote. But God will not usually ravish he will only court.

Whatever else it may or may not be, prayer is at least talking to yourself, and that’s in itself not always a bad idea.Talk to yourself about your own life, about what you’ve done and what you’ve failed to do, and about who you are and about who you wish you were and who the people you love are and the people you don’t love too. Talk to yourself about what matters most to you, because if you don’t, you may forget what matters most to you. Even if you don’t believe anybody’s listening, at least you’ll be listening. Believe somebody is listening. Believe in miracles. That’s what Jesus told the father who asked him to heal his epileptic son. Jesus said, “All things are possible to him who believes. “ And the father spoke for all of us when he answered, “Lord, I believe; help my unbelief!” (Mark 9:14-29).

What about when the boy is not healed? When, listened to or not listened to, the prayer goes unanswered? Who knows? Just keep praying, Jesus says. Remember the sleepy friend, the crooked judge. Even if the boys dies, keep on beating the path to God’s door, because the one thing you can be sure of is that down the path you beat with even your most half-cocked and halting prayer the God you call upon will finally come, and even if he does not bring you the answer you want, he will bring you himself. And maybe at the secret heart of all prayers that is what we are really praying for.

We Go This Way But Once

Often I find myself asking, “What does love look like in this situation?” How can I best love this person? ” There is a fine line sometimes between knowing what or what not to do. My prayer is often, “How can I support my friend without being an enabler?” “When do I need to act and when do I need to let go.” Love is not an easy task. Love requires fortitude. Love requires patience and listening. Love requires a true desire to make peace and be helpful. I’ve come a long way from being a “fixer and rescuer” which was not truly love. My intentions were to show love, but my actions often hindered growth and healing for myself and the other person. I love the quote by Eric Fromm, “Love is union with somebody, or something, outside oneself, under the condition of retaining the separateness and integrity of one's own self.” Boundaries are very important. Respect is big part of human love as well.

I don’t know about you but my life is so busy and full that I find it is NECESSARY to MAKE times of reflection and creativity. How else are we to begin to understand what is needed? Our souls must have a time for listening for seeking quiet wisdom.  We must open our hearts and quiet our minds DAILY to be ready to meet the situations and experiences of our day. We are all HUMAN and need not pretend to be anything else, but being human is a beautiful thing when we seek to be our best, when we seek to love.

We make a lot of mistakes and must make amends as soon as we realize them.  I love this quote by the Dalai Lama, “If you can, help others; if you cannot do that, at least do not harm them.” Sometimes we harm without meaning to. As soon as we see this, we must seek to make amends. This life is a beautiful journey that we must take seriously;  absorbing and retaining the lessons of each day and at the same time take lightly enough to enjoy the laughter, beauty, and fun of each day as well. We must seek to find this balance.

Here is a little poem found in a book by K. Quinn Lewis (1943) WE GO THIS WAY BUT ONCE:

We go this way but once, Oh heart of mine
So why not make the journey well worthwhile
Giving to those who travel with us
A helping hand, a word of cheer, a smile?

We go this way but once, Ah never more
Can we go back along the self same way?
To get more out of life, undo the wrongs,
or speak love's words we knew but did not say.

We go this way but once, then let us make
The road we travel blossomy and sweet
With helpful, kindly deeds and tender words
smoothing the path of bruised and stumbling feet.

Let us make time to be still. Let us seek to listen to our lives. Thanks for stopping by. Until next time…PEACE. With love, Jeanne

Practicing "Listening, Receiving and Meditating on All That is Good."

This past Sunday driving to my evening study group, I found myself thinking about how throughout my life the negative, painful experiences have wounded me and how these experiences seem to be taken to heart easily, resounding within me. I have sought to be healed and transformed by them, learning much from many of these experiences. As I thought about this I began praying to become a person in whom the positive experiences in my life will be as deeply received, owned, digested and absorbed by my heart, mind and soul. I asked in my prayer and thoughts that evening, “Why is it more difficult to receive and absorb the positive, grace-filled, better moments of my life?”

The next day, I was hosting a Spiritual Direction Group.  I studied Spiritual Direction for two years in a program. All of these folks went through that same program. We meet quarterly to share, pray, choose a book to read and discuss, and work on a Spiritual Direction case. I look forward to these meetings. In our discussion time, I brought up these thoughts and prayer. Everyone agreed that it was much more difficult to accept these positive expressions and experiences.  One member said that we are always taught to think of others and in many ways conditioned to focus on loving God, others and rarely focusing on ourselves. I strongly identified with this statement.

In my earliest days of becoming a Christian I was taught, JOY was Jesus first, Others second and Yourself last. The problem was that in the ministry I was involved in, there was very little time to ever get to myself. My needs were neglected, ignored and I did not feel the right to care for my own soul in the way that it should have been cared for. I have learned since then how very important it is to take time to know myself, to own my weaknesses and work on them and to own my gifts. I have been practicing these things for quite a few years now and it has made a wonderful difference in my life. For that I am grateful.

After our Spiritual Direction meeting I was walking my dog on the “Creeper Trail” path and thought more about this and it dawned on me that in order to become a “MAGNET FOR THE POSITIVE, LOVING, GRACE-FILLED EXPERIENCES” I will need to make this a practice.  Throughout each day and perhaps at the end of the day, I will point out to myself all the positive experiences that happen. I will write them in a tiny journal and read them often. PRAYER AND PRACTICE has brought about some major changes in other areas of my life. I think this will be very helpful in learning to let these experiences take preference in myself. I invite you to join me in this PRAYER AND PRACTICE OF THE POSITIVE if you too struggle with the balance of these two.

Here are a few good quotes concerning this issue:

He who would be useful, strong, and happy must cease to be a passive receptacle for the negative, beggarly, and impure streams of thought; and as a wise householder commands his servants and invites his guests, so must he learn to command his desires and to say, with authority, what thoughts he shall admit into the mansion of his soul.  ~ James Allen

Make the most of yourself, for that is all there is of you. 

 ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

Thanks for stopping by! Until next time…PEACE. ~ With love, Jeanne

Spiritual Jacuzzi

In 2004 my husband, Jim and I recorded a CD. It was a Living Room Production that had been in the making for quite some time. In our busy lives finding the time to do a guitar part here and a vocal there, resulted in a collection of 12 tunes we called “Differently the Same”.

In the words of Jim Denton, "What does it mean? Well we are still Jim and Jeanne just a bit older. The difference is that we are asking better questions about faith, life, love and our world, than we were in our earlier days. Asking a better question tends toward deeper and critical thinking. This helps inform our faith journey, which then helps shape the choices we make. Sometimes it's simple and sometimes it is quite complex. At any rate it makes a difference.” 

This is the last song on the CD and is entitled "Spiritual Jacuzzi." We had the privilege of hearing an interview with Joan Chittister where she said that many people seem to want a “Religious Jacuzzi” instead of an authentic spiritual life. This expression stayed with us. It stirred us to think of other such expressions, like “They use the Bible like an Uzi” and so on. This song speaks against the self-centered manipulation of faith.

This is the only song from the "Rock" genre on the CD. I hope even if it's not your taste in music that you'll give it a listen. Thanks for stopping by! By the way..I'm adding this comment a few days after posting this. A friend viewed this and added something important in a comment to me on FB. She said, " I listened to this song a few days ago ~ and I would add~The self-centered manipulation of people with tender hearts and immature development of critical thinking skills~" This is an important reminder that we have all done this and God's grace covers each of us. Let this song be a prayer and reminder to all of us to seek a deeper more grace filled understanding of God's love for us all!

Peace, Jeanne Leigh

  

I AM SITTING HERE THINKING ....

Almost 8 years ago, my husband Jim and I recorded a CD in our "Living Room" called Differently the Same by Jim and Jeanne. This song entitled "I AM SITTING HERE THINKING" was one of Jim's ideas that didn't end up on the CD. We forgot about it and thought we'd lost it. The other day, he came across it on a homemade CD that was in our car. We listened to it driving somewhere. I love it and thought it would be fun to make a video with my oldest son, Justin's art, my art and few of Jim's pieces. I really enjoyed putting this together. Thanks for stopping by and giving it a look and a listen. I hope you enjoy it. Peace, Jeanne Leigh

HONORING THE EARTH

Painting by Justin Denton

I have always loved nature and felt a connection to the earth. When I spend time outside, I feel more alive and often sense an attitude of reverence within. In the last ten years or more that connection has deepened and grown in me. I experience God's presence in nature more then any other place. I have recognized the relationship that I have with the earth in a new way.

I am reading a book The Dream of the Earth by Thomas Berry. Thomas Berry is one of the leading environmental thinkers in North America. He is described on the back cover of this book as:

"a cultural historian who provides nothing less than a new intellectual-ethical framework for the human community by positing planetary well-being as the measure of all human activity. Drawing on the wisdom of Western philosophy, Asian thought, Native American traditions as well as contemporary physics and evolutionary biology, Berry offers a new perspective that recasts our understanding of science, technology, politics and religion, ecology and education. He shows us why it is important for us to respond to the Earth's need for planetary renewal, and what we must do to break free of the technological trance that guides a misguided dream of progress. Only then, he suggests, can we foster mutually human-Earth relationships that can heal our traumatized global bio-system".

My first introduction to Thomas Berry was at a retreat that my husband, Jim and I attended a few years ago. The retreat was a combination of the works of Thomas Berry and Thomas Merton. We already revered Thomas Merton but were unfamiliar with Thomas Berry. It was a wonderful and informative retreat. This past year we also attended a viewing of a film made about a book Berry co-authored with Brian Swimme called The Universe Story. We loved the film.

About eight months ago I purchased The Green Bible New Testament and I am enjoying it. Even before scripture begins there are all these wonderful quotes from many different men and women throughout the centuries about spirituality and nature. A few of my favorite quotes are these: 

Wherever I turn my eyes, around on Earth or to the heavens

I see You in the field of star

I see You in the yield of land

In every breath and sound, a blade of grass, a simple flower 

An echo of Your holy Name. ~ Abraham ibn Ezra (1092-1167

We shall awaken from our dullness and rise vigorously toward justice. If we fall in love with creation deeper and deeper, we will respond to its endangerment with passion. ~ Hildegard of Bingen (1098-1179)

If I spend enough time with the tiniest creature--even a caterpillar--I would never have to prepare a sermon. So full of God is every creature. Meister Eckhart (ca.1260-1327) 

God writes the Gospel not in the Bible alone, but also on trees, and in the flowers and clouds and stars. ~ Martin Luther (1483-1546)  

There is a lot to be learned here and applied. I am in the process of doing both. In the meantime, I am so grateful for this beautiful earth. Here is a little video meditation I did recently. Thank you for dropping by! Peace, Jeanne Leigh

MYSTERY

MYSTERY is one of my favorite words pertaining to my spiritual life. When I first became a Christian all the blanks were filled in for me. Thought I had all the answers. It was all black and white. Through life experiences and struggles, I have come to believe that there are many gray areas and I have more questions then answers. As I grow I realize that my questions become better. This is a poem I wrote in 1992. Peace, Jeanne
CLICK ON THE PICTURE AND IT WILL ENLARGE A BIT.



Winter Solstice Celebration

Every December 21st for the last 7 years we have been part of an ecumenical celebration of the Winter Solstice at the beautiful Jubilee House Retreat Center in Abingdon, VA. We have a lovely meal together and enjoy some music, poetry, and reflections of the year  ending and what we'd like to leave behind. We share a fire and several different meaningful rituals such as "Praying in the Four Directions", a "Native American Sage Smudging" and various other traditions.This year's theme was "Appalachia." Our band, WISE OLD RIVER always plays music for this event. This year we played My Land, the title song of our latest CD. We also played Virginia Song which will be on our next CD. This is a celebration of the longest night of the year.

The wikipedia says this:
The winter solstice occurs exactly when the axial tilt of a planet's polar hemisphere is farthest away from the star that it orbits. Earth's maximum axial tilt to our star, the Sun, during a solstice is 23° 26'. More evident from high latitudes, a hemisphere's winter solstice occurs on the shortest day and longest night of the year, when the sun's daily maximum elevation in the sky is the lowest. Since the winter solstice lasts only a moment in time, other terms are often used for the day on which it occurs, such as midwinter, the longest night or the first day of winter.

The seasonal significance of the winter solstice is in the reversal of the gradual lengthening of nights and shortening of days. Depending on the shift of the calendar, the winter solstice usually occurs on December 21 to 22 each year in the Northern Hemisphere, and June 20 to 21 in the Southern Hemisphere.
Worldwide, interpretation of the event has varied from culture to culture, but most northern hemisphere cultures have held a recognition of rebirth, involving holidays, festivals, gatherings, rituals or other celebrations around that time.



A few years ago I wrote this for the Winter Solstice Celebration:

DARKNESS:So often can be related to evil, fear, pain, depression, loss
As a result it makes us uncomfortable; we seek to avoid it, at all cost….
Noise, activity, artificial light, we seek to elude its grasp…..
DARKNESS:
It’s a natural part of life. A necessary part of life. In darkness things grow…seeds buried in the darkness of soil along with minerals and nutrients…grow beautiful flowers, plants, fruits, vegetables,
In darkness…images become real from negatives in a dark room.
In the darkness of a cocoon, a caterpillar goes through its natural process and then with difficulty and struggle it emerges as a beautiful moth, or butterfly.
The seasons on our planet all play an important part of the balance of our world. The Moon, The Sun…..the changes…
The seasons of our lives do this as well…
It is in the dark times, as we embrace them while learning the importance of allowing ourselves to be kind and supportive to ourselves in this darkness and learning to accept the kind and supportive support from others in this darkness that we experience a mystery.
It is in the dark times that we are stretched, we are deepened, we grow in our understanding, and we have our hearts enlarged, our spirits expanded and our minds broadened.


Bruce Cockburn expresses this concept well in a song he wrote called PACING THE CAGE. He has a line in it that says,
"Sometimes the road leads through dark places. Sometimes the darkness is your friend".

The darkness does not last forever. It is a part of our lives. The light will come again. We need both to be balanced. We need both in order to become all that we can be.


Embrace the darkness.
Embrace the light.

Peace, Jeanne Leigh

Kiss of an Angel

In 1990, I found myself in a very difficult place. I was leaving a Ministry/Intentional Community where I had lived and worked for twenty years. I’d invested my youth, creativity and all that I was and had in this work, but the fact remained that I had come to a place of growth and change that did not allow me to continue to be part of this organization. Yet, the people of this community were my “family,” church, employers and neighbors. It’s a hard thing to understand unless you have lived such an experience. The leadership at that time did not take kindly to folks leaving which was unfortunate for us all. So, thus the beginning of our difficulties.


I had just lost a brother to AIDS and had cared for him during the most difficult 18 months of his life. I was beginning to reconnect with my natural family who had never been close. Jim and I were starting over in so many ways. My children were going through major adjustments. Jim and I were finding new jobs having been out of the secular work force for 20 years. At times all of these adjustments were overwhelming.

I was meeting with a Spiritual Director weekly which was helpful. I knew our decision to leave was right and good for our family. I was grateful we had the courage to make a new life for ourselves. I prayed and worked hard each day to be there for my family and sought to make the best of each new situation that arose.

One night I had a dream. It was more then a dream. Something was spoken to my spirit, a word was given to my heart that we would be all right. A peace came over me which was a gift that I will never forget. I was so moved by the experience that I wrote these words which became a song that Jim later wrote the music for. It reminds me that in those times when we feel we cannot take another step forward, if we will open our hearts and spirits to that which is greater than ourselves, then we will be carried, held and given what we need to move forward. I am thankful for this truth!!!

I named the song “Kiss of an Angel.” Here are the words
Kiss of an Angel


It was the Kiss of an Angel that spoke to me
As I awoke, was it only a dream?
It was a tender moment that I could not touch.
That I could not grasp, to me it gave so much.


Through time and space not a sound it did make,
With light more gold than honey but much Sweeter to the taste.


It was a moment of knowing that I will not forget
There is no need for explanation, I simply choose to believe it.
It was a different kind of music, a melody in perfect time,
A symphony of salvation a song with holy rhyme.


Through time and space not a sound it did make
With light more gold than honey but much sweeter to the taste.


It was the Kiss of an Angel that spoke to me
As I awoke, was it only a dream?


~Jeanne Leigh Denton



HAPPY THANKSGIVNG FROM OUR HOME TO YOURS!!!!

Respecting All Beings

I have really enjoyed walking the trails where I live and biking some as well since we moved here four months ago. It warms my heart to see the ducks walking their little babies down to the river each day. The river even in this short time has expressed many a mood. Most times it is gentle, quiet, sweet and deeply serene. Then at other times fast, turbulent, noisy and swelling as it displays a glimpse of its potential power.
I’ve become acquainted with most of the white ducks. They are domesticated and Noah and I often feed them. The Mallards and geese vary. I’ve seen some very beautiful ducks come through this area and photographed a few which I will share in this post.

Several times I stopped by the river to witness some child/youth abusing these ducks. The first time, a boy about twelve was standing with his father or guardian and he picked up a huge rock and threw it at the baby ducks in the water. I did not hear or notice his father say anything to him. The boy looked over at me and I gave him a look that said it all. He nervously smirked at me. I was upset and stayed around and interacted with the adults that were with him. I talked to them about how beautiful these little ducks were as I took some photographs. There was no more rock throwing. They left.



Another time, a girl about the age of ten was screaming and violently waving her arms as she chased the ducks shouting, “I HATE YOU!” as her parents/guardians stood by with a child in a stroller. I did not see them tell her to stop, so I walked over and said, “Oh, honey don’t do that, those ducks will turn around and bite you so hard! It really hurts!” She stopped in her tracks and her parents looked up at me. I went over and talked to the parents/guardians about how wonderful the wild life was in the area. They left quietly. Those ducks were disturbed and lost a bunch of their feathers running from that child.



The last time an older teen-age boy was with his friends and was doing about the same thing the girl had done. I walked over and told him, “You need to stop doing that, you probably don’t know this but there is an ordinance against harassing/harming the wildlife along the river here. You can get in trouble for that.” He proceeded to laugh his head off and his friends joined in. I took my phone out and acted like I was calling someone. They left laughing, but I think they were a little freaked out

Yesterday, I went to the Town Hall to inquire if there actually was an ordinance or law protecting these birds. The man I talked to said that the Mallards and Geese were covered under Federal and State Law and that the Game Wardens would take care of it, but for the white ducks since they were domesticated that he wasn’t sure. He called a police officer over and I told him this story. Officer Turner was very respectful and told me they were having a staff meeting later and he’d make the staff aware of it. He gave me his card and wrote the dispatcher number on it and told me to call if I see anything like that again. He said they’d do extra patrols to watch the area, too. This made me feel little better. We’re armed and ready. Well, thanks for listening. From an Undercover Duck Agent, Peace….Jeanne

ALL PHOTOGRAPHS BY JEANNE DENTON

Please do not copy without permission.